So you are dating someone from MYSPACE, and they have friends on there, that they stay in touch with….some are real friends some are friends that they have met through myspace…the same way they met you..so now you two are dating..and they even changed their profile to say “In a Relationship” so you change yours…you leave each other little comments, its all little love and kisses and miss you etc.  Then  you see his  friends still leave their comments too. So when do you worry about the friends comments? We all know some ppl do crap just do crap on there to try to claim someone and they never met them. So do you take it for what it is…just comments..some he may have never met…some he may have dated at one time. But it was before you, so do you let it get  or do you freak out over it? If you are dating someone who obviously has been on these sites a time or two and has a lot of friends, or may be re-created their page…just in time for you two to meet and doesn’t have a lot of friends yet but the comments are loading up, should you worry?

Do you start sending out messages to these so called friends and see what the deal is, or not worry about it, because he comes home to you every night? MMMM I wonder…you see I have been on both sides of this, and I have been guilty of wondering the same thing…and sending that NOTE…..what’s the deal with you and MY MAN..well mine wasn’t exactly like that, my boyfriend and I had actually broke up. Then a  few months go by and he  even moved in with another woman, then the text messages and emails started to me, saying he messed up and wanted me back. So I sent a message to her, to warn her…because he had met her at his job and was starting this same crap with her when he lived with me. So I thought I should warn her because she knew he lived w/ me and felt it was ok to open doors, so I thought  Karma’s a bitch and ya man is trying to move back in….so call it vindictive but it sure wasn’t about insecurities!

So back to today I logged in to myspace and there was that MESSAGE from my male friends girlfriend! Oh lord I thought here we go…this guy was mentioned in my previous blog..the one who doesn’t have it all together, he is actually in the process of rebuilding his life after a  few  rough years. But women are crazy about him with that smile. He just gets these women who are just obsessed with him. We have been friends for years, he knows my deepest secrets and I know his! Did we date at one time, well lets just say we have been through ALOT together and are very close..but I respect any decision he makes and want him happy. I know this man like no other…I know the kind of woman that he needs and I am not saying its me, I have even told him that, there is a point when you pass relationship potential to just friends I think, and  you two are just friends even if you were involved at one time or not. 

He needs a woman who can handle all of his female friends and accept his ways, and when he needs his space he needs his space. The man is in his 30’s and he is who he is and probably will not change. However, he is trying a lot with this woman, he has done things for this woman that I have not seen him do before, with anyone he has dated,  so she needs to get it together or he is going to run as fast as he can if she keeps pushing. Problem is they have been dating only a few months and I think he has convinced himself way before he met her, its time to settle down. He has been through a lot  as I mentioned these past few years and feels the clock is ticking for whatever reason. Now he is ready to be married, or at least settled down. Now in the all of sudden change from Player to wanting to be married, he has jumped head first into this relationship, not really knowing this woman and telling everyone how perfect she was for him and I think a little embarrassed he made her out to be something she never was…why do we do that put each other on pedestals, or make us into something that we never were or never could live up to?  Now he feels smothered and is freak-in out not knowing what to do, because he can not change his personality nor change over night.

 Not that he was ever a cheater, he was one of those guys that would tell you I am not ready for a relationship, so basically we are friends with benefits type of dudes and lets just say over the years he had A LOT OF  “FRIENDS” w/ beny’s kinda thing….and that is a hard habit to break..heck even for a woman its a hard habit to break.  When he is out he flirts naturally without knowing it…and any woman who is with him needs to know this about him. He doesn’t mean to hurt your feelings, thats just who he is…and will always be. He will always have women around him but he has learned to finally put boundaries out there…so good for him.  He is trying…he really is with her..but I still can’t help but think,  does he really love her, or is he settling and trying to convince himself because he made her out to be this perfect match in less than 2 months. Now she is clingy, asking where he is all the time, every five mins. If he gets a call , she is all in his business and jealous, demanding of his attention saying he is on her time. I feel a little to blame, because  I told him a few months ago  before he met her when he decides to settle down, he has to cut off all his “friends” w/ beny’s thing and show whoever he decided to be with that she is the “ONE” and he will do what ever it takes to make her feel secure….well now I still feel like , yes you should do this, but that is  IF they are the “ONE”  but ya know when they are THAT ONE,  its a feeling that is there always.. and you are not second guessing it two months down the road (may be 5 yrs down the road ya will LOL j/k)  when they are freaking out on you when you don’t answer the phone. Or if there are a few times where you didn’t answe the phone and then had to explain why you may not have been available, and it was explained in a reasonable matter, then  its dropped and done with and not brought up again. Ladies I am not saying don’t ask the question but its all about approach and how ya handle it…ya feel me? This chic freaks out…this will send any man running like a thief in the night…baby girl needs to slow her roll and should have saved this side of her to at least till she got his ass living with her LMAO…just joking!!! Now my poor boy doesn’t know what to do, he doesn’t want to be the bad guy because she has told him her sob story,  how everyone has always bailed on her..and abandoned her SNIFF SNIFF…WTF EVER..well yeah know baby girl,  my daddy and every man I  have ever known, has done the same  damn thing to me too, but hey no use to cry over spilled milk get the F over it….don’t take your past crap into the new relationship…if he is really trying and I believe he is for him…then she better count her blessings and realize she is the closest to any woman has EVER Gotten his ass to EVER think about settling down…(most women just try to get prego by him to hold on to him) but I don’t think she is the right one for him, her insecurities are going to destroy it plus she seems a little high maintenance but hey I don’t know the chic and there are two sides to every story right, but she sent me the note, so now I am entitled to some kind of opinion! The bytch is crazy…LMAO just joking…if he loves her then hey its all good in the hood its his nightmare…I mean funeral I mean life…yeah thats it…. JOKES MAN lighten up!!! I think he has just convinced himself he needs to save her or not be the bad guy and abandon her too.

So now she is all threaten about our friendship and I live over 1800 miles away!!! We leave comments on each others pages now and then, text each other from time to time…call each other when something major happens  in our live but thats about it! So she sends me this message asking me,  what we are, if we are just OLD FRIENDS etc…the comments make her think more, now we have always left comments miss ya, love ya those kinds of things forever..way before her, so now she is trying to chase his FEMALE friends away, now I know some of the women  and men can befriend someone just in hopes you may fall in love with them, so I understand sista but there are also complete strangers out there waiting to snatch his ass up too, if ya turn your back for any length of time. So anyway I hope he doesn’t allow it to happen with his true friends, but as long as he is happy I guess that is what matters RIGHT? So her message continues saying we even have tats of each others names on their backs and she can prove it! Get a grip lady…I am thinking….and she says,  they are moving in together and he picks up her son blah blah blah and I am like chic this is SOOO  left field, I do not care….get over yourself….but as much as I wanted to be evil about it and be woman and really say something bad and really just F w/ her….I sent him a message and asked him what it was all about. Now I was at work all day and was busy , so I didn’t see this until I got home from work, she sent this to me in the am, so we are talking like 6ish West Coast time and they are central. So he said well, she told me she sent you a message and I was wondering why you hadn’t said anything, she said you replied to her? I said no I didn’t, I contacted you first…so what does that tell ya?? The chic is a manipulator….complusive liar…I don’t know take your pick. The things he has told me even before all this she sounds like a loose cannon! But I was the good friend..and  did what HE told me to tell her…added a few words of my own…but I told her she needs to stop being so insecure and start trusting him before she loses a good man and that I didn’t really want to be involved. Then I forwarded the message to him and told him, this is what I said, and out of respect for whatever this is and our friendship, I will not leave you anymore message on your little myspace page…and I hope you figure it out and this is what you want and all that good stuff….he said thanks love ya always babe. Hey I feel like April in that movie….OMG!!! I am APRIL…in Definitely MAYBE!!!!  My GF keeps telling me we are in love and always have been and we need to throw in the towel and stop it with these random ppl…I say if we were, we would have figured that out a LONGGGGGGGGGGG time ago and made it work. Am I APRIL??? OMG I need a drink…

Another Internet Nightmare..I am April……………….Lord I hope NOT……I need to find love and QUICK!!!!